Only Chuck Norris Need Apply

I don't specifically go trolling for amusing Craigslist posts, but I did come across one for a set of branding irons - only real men allowed:

If you don’t have any cattle that need branding, I suppose you could still purchase these irons… but I might charge you more. You could use one as a poker for the store bought logs in your fire pit in your back yard. They might also go well with your Corinthian Leather couch in the family room of your cookie cutter suburban home. What you might also do is hang one of these babies on the wall of your kitchen above the microwave. Then, while your fat, pencil pushing fingers are mashing buttons to heat up your supper, you can gaze upon the working instruments of real men and ponder the true origin of meat in your chili cheese dog.

Mmmmm...chili cheese dog...